He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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