You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
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