Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I looked at my own cervix.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
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I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
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Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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