Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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