Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
