I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
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