last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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