there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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