The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize