It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
