I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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