Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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