If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
