and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
