I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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