This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
