YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
