I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
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There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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