Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
