I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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