Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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