she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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