My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
