Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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