So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
