Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm sobbing to NWA