Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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