this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize
