I need help removing her.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize