His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize