O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
