Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I need to stop coming to work sober
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
