If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
