i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
COCAINE IS GR8
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize