i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize