Soap is not a condiment
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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