end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
it glows. i had to have it.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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