Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
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