he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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