I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
