I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize