i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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