worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
