Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
