i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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