your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Randomize
