you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
