Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I am one with the molecules
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.