super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE