id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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