Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
