BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You left your underwear on the fireplace
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
